My yoga teacher asked to an obediently silent class recently, "How we all doing tonight?...Good?" with an inflection in her voice that signaled the only answer should be "Great. Fine. Ok. Hanging in there."
Often we embed statements inside our questions. Clearly, my yoga teacher was doing that; meaning the only right answer was yes, in fact, we are all doing great.
Notice the statement embedded in a question.
Here's some examples, inflection in the voice inferred by the italics.
- Do you really want to go out to eat tonight?
- Do you think I look fat in this dress? (See the entire blog dedicated to this question)
- Don’t you think you’d rather….When we hear this line, invariably the questioner is speaking about themselves and their rather. They would rather do something else.
How can I be more direct in my communication and thus more effective? How can message sent be truly the message I wanted to send? How might I be obstaclizing (made up word I use frequently) and hindering my truth from emerging? Do I tell myself a narrative that I don’t have a right to make a declarative statement? I don’t deserve to ask for what I want in statement form. Do I have to be convoluted and obtuse in proclaiming what I want? Perhaps in order to be heard, I think this is the case.
All questions worth pondering. Words, questions, statements all worthy of scrutiny and gentle architectural overhaul.